Thursday, December 29, 2005

Adieu 2005!

2005 may not be a great year for me but it has been nice and easy so to speak… it was a tough year but I got all the help I can have from up above and from friends and family.

I thank the year for…

* the lessons taught and learned --- the hard and easy way
* the people who crossed my life this year --- who became a friend or a foe
* the experiences good or bad that I can look back with a smile or frown when I grow old
* the opportunities that I embraced and let go
* the prayers answered and unanswered
* the healthy and solid family
* the new blogging experience
* the many things that brought joy as well as bitterness to the year that was.


Now, I welcome 2006 with all its uncertainties. I pray that this year may bring me good things in all the aspects of my life ---pwede sad bad things pero ayaw sad ng bad kaayo ha nga dili na nako ma-handle.

Seriously, I’m quite positive that 2006 will be a good year for me --- let’s just cross our fingers.

Saturday, December 10, 2005


I’ve been dying to read Julie Yap-Daza’s book entitled “Etiquette for Mistresses”. I’ve been searching almost all National bookstore chains here in Cebu but seem to be running out of stock, I guess. My interest in getting hold of the book was made more intense when a friend of mine wrote an article in her blog about this book. So, what I did was to browse through the internet and just search for some excerpts of this book. Not that I am a mistress, but being a wife made me curious what are the etiquettes of these so-called “home-wrecker”.

While searching the web for related articles, I found these rules at someone else's blogsite.

Pretty interesting indeed…

Here are the rules:
Rule #1: Mistress is not Mrs. Know your place.
Rule #2: Even if he tells you he loves you more than his wife, don’t let that go to your head. As a rule, men are liars.
Rule #3: Mistresses should be ready to give up Valentine’s Day, Christmas Day, New Year’s Day, Holy Week and his birthday (that’s why mistresses are also called “holiday orphans" because of this).
Rule #4: Befriend his secretary but avoid all contact with his driver (Whether he is a company driver or the family driver, the chauffeur is not to be trusted. Family drivers owe their allegiance to whoever pays them their salary and who feeds them the free meals in the kitchen with the other help. In short, they are loyal to the Mrs. more than the Mr.).
Rule #5: As tempting as it seems, don’t patronize the wife’s beauty parlor, jewelry shop, dress shop, or father confessor.
Rule #6: Don’t call him, wait for him to call.
Rule #7: To be seen with him in public once is risky. The second time could be fatal to one of you. The third time is The End for both of you (love is lovelier when it’s forbidden. Because it’s forbidden, it’s supposed to be hidden).
Rule #8: Never believe, and never say anything unfriendly about his wife, not even after he recites a litany of her faults.
Rule #9: Mistresses are kept by rich men. But a mistress who is a woman of substance and independent means is better (Translation: Don’t ask him for money).
Rule #10: Be discreet (Make sure he is not the type to talk in the sleep).
Rule #11: Never travel together (Accidents will always happen. You can never tell).
Rule #12: When he breaks a date, charge it to fate, not his fecklessness (Men will be boys. They will forget to call. They will break a date at the last minute. They will stand you up. They won’t explain and they won’t ask for forgiveness. But don’t cry nor throw a tantrum. Don’t break down because a mistress is supposed to understand a man more than his wife does).
Rule #13: Wives have their own networks of spies and amigas. It is helpful for the mistress to have her own. A chaperone is not a good idea, however (Chaperones are passe. Besides, they talk).
Rule #14: Mistresses don’t complain (They shouldn’t. It’s the wives, according to the husbands, who are “always complaining).
Rule #15: Being No. 2, the mistress tries harder.
Rule #16: Send him home as soon as it becomes apparent that he’s overstaying.
Rule #17: It is practical for a mistress to be linked to another man, preferably her lover’s friend.
Rule #18: If he’s a public man and you’re thinking of staging an accident of running into him, think: How many accidents can I pull off in one month?
Rule #19: Don’t make unnecessary enemies of his children.
Rule #20: Remind him to pay for everything in cash – dinner, flowers, perfume, champagne, pearls, diamonds, a microwave oven, etc….
Rule #21: Don’t use tears as a weapon. He’s probably had enough of that from the Mrs. (Wives nag. Wives cry. If only for that reason, a mistress doesn’t use tears to get what she wants).
Rule #22: Resist the urge to be found.
Rule #23: Perish all thought that someday you’ll be No. 1.
Rule #24: Married men who keep mistresses don’t like surprises, as a rule.
Rule #25: A man with a mistress leads a double life, his mistress only a half life. Cheer up! A career will make you whole.
Rule #26: Resist the urge to shower him with gifts. Evidence, evidence….!
Rule #27: When in doubt, disappear.
Rule #28: When all else fails, leave him.

I fervently pray that in my marriage, there will never be "biatches" who will attempt to destroy my family --- I will definitely fight hell with them even if they religiously follow the above rules.

Thursday, December 08, 2005

Christmas Wishlist

Christmas Wishlist

It’s December!!! Rain started pouring out all over the metropolis. Bright, colorful lights flicker around the household and establishments.People are starting to crowd the malls and major department stores. These are the signs that Christmas is just around the corner. It’s supposed to be the most wonderful time of the year as the song goes.

People started decorating their homes with Christmas ornaments. Christmas carols are being played in most radio stations and pipe-in speakers in malls and stores. Everyone started wrapping their gifts for friends and loved ones.

As a kid, I have always loved Christmas. My parents used to let us write a letter to Santa asking what we want to receive from him during Christmas. It was always fun having to list down all the stuff we want mostly toys and candies and new clothes. We roll our letters and placed it in the Christmas stocking (Papa’s old socks) at our door. Then on Christmas day, Papa would always sneak in to our rooms while we are still asleep pretending to be Santa Claus and placed the gifts beside our bed. Papa would always say that the gifts came from Santa. But it wasn’t for long that we believed him thus the tradition died a natural death as we grow older. How I miss those times I wish I was a kid again.

Though I don’t literally write down my Christmas wishlist like I used to, I always have in my heart the things I want to receive. But I guess, it would be fun to bring back the tradition once again of writing a letter to Santa…here it goes…

Dear Santa,

I hope it won’t be too much to ask for the following this Christmas:

1. Please let me win the lotto so I could pay all my utang.
2. MP3 Player to make it through the graveyard shift
3. Trip to Hong Kong with my husband and daughter --- if you let me win the lotto
4. A new pair of Levi’s jeans
5. Free driving lessons from husband
6. A sponsored ukay-ukay shopping spree or shopping spree
7. A Baby Boy --- hopefully next year!

I’m not really asking you to give me all of the above --- number 1 and 7 would do. **wink**



I hope the real Santa would be generous this time, hehehe. I'm pretty sure Papa could not afford the stuff I'm asking.

Seriously, it doesn't really matter much to me if I receive gifts this season or not. I'm contented with what God has blessed me all these years. What's really important is having a good health, a stable career, a wonderful family and peace of mind.


Monday, December 05, 2005

over the weekend...

@ Cosmopolitan

We were shaken by the death of Rhea's boyfriend of almost six years. Rhea is a good friend of mine in College and George also became a friend of the entire batch. They met during Rhea's radio internship where George works as a reporter. He was shot last Thursday night at his food stall in Talisay right in front of Rhea. They're suppose to tie the knot next year and it was too painful for Rhea. Police is still investigating for the motive of the killing. Right now, the lone gunman is still at large. Family and friends are seeking justice for the killing of another mediaman ---a son, a boyfriend, a brother, a friend.

Some of our batchmates visited the wake last Friday to comfort Rhea and to take one last glimpse of our friend. It was like a reunion of some sort but in a very painful set-up.

@ Vistamar

I attended the Philippine Association of Secretaries' Christmas Party/Induction of New Set of Officers and New Members. I am one of those to be inducted as a new member of the association.

I have also well prepared for this event having to participate in the dance showdown together with my committee - Education committee. It has been a very tough week for all of us having to practice our dance number and having to shell out a big amount of money to pay for our choreographer and all our costumes and make-up.

But our efforts were not put to waste because WE WON!

sayaw kikay lalalalala

the winning move hahaha

with the ladies @ the executive support

guwapa kaau ko...the miracle of make-up

Saturday night party @ Beach Roots

I need not elaborate what it is...the pics will show...

Tuesday, November 22, 2005

one year

Today marks my first year anniversary of being employed with my present employer. Career-wise, it seems like nothing has improved and that I was stagnant for the past year. There are some new things that I have learned though but it was far beyond what my previous employer can offer.

I left GS after having been employed for almost five years mainly because of financial reasons. My current employer, being an American company has offered me almost twice the amount of what I have been receiving in GS. I also have no qualms having to go back to staff level and earn this much. I have made my mark with GS and climbing through the corporate ladder --- I was almost there but then the money motivated me more. My family is growing and I still have some obligations to my parents and my siblings, I accepted the offer with a heavy heart. It was tough leaving behind the company whom I have learned to love, whose culture I have learned to embrace and whose direction I am certain with.

Right now, I am uncertain what this company has in-store for me aside from the 10-digit salary that I am earning monthly. I just realize that in this rat race, money isn’t the “it”. It’s a motivation but will never be a satisfaction. I have longed to work again in the HR field. I miss the fulfilling role of working with people --- facilitating trainings, working on employee benefits, conducting interviews, company events, performance reviews, managing feelings. I miss the role of being the “employee champion” again.

I have a wonderful team in the executive support services department. I have a great boss we call Ms. O. But I just hate it when some people in the company misconstrue us of being “just the secretary” or simply somebody people can boss around with --- telephone operator, call for taxi, call for food delivery, supplier of tissue paper, sometimes the utility. It’s not that I’m complaining but sometimes it’s just too much and what they’re asking is no longer in my job description. Of course, there’s what you call “going the extra mile” in everything you do. Whatever!

So, it’s my one year anniversary in this company. I appreciated the fact that the company recognized our presence during our monthly general assembly. Oh yeah, and having to put our resume pictures in a powerpoint presentation showing our colleagues how we look like one year ago…it’s so sweet of them huh!

Pardon me if I’m like complaining a lot --- I’m just not happy anymore. Cheers to my one year anniversary…I’m glad I’m still alive!!!

The Graveyard Look

Tuesday, November 08, 2005

being happy...

"Being happy doesn't mean that everything is perfect. It means you've decided to see life beyond the imperfections. So, don't say you're happy because everything is alright. Be happy because everything sucks but you're just fine..." -- Anonymous

While it’s true that I complain a lot about my life right now --- about the way I look, about my job, about my marriage, about our country, about our government --- it just dawned on me that there’s a lot of things to be thankful about. My life has been a roller-coaster ride for the past 26 years. I was faced with countless battles which I have won over without me realizing it.

Why am I writing about this? Because I came across that quotation above which really hit me.

There isn’t any person in this world that has a perfect life. Agree? Some may be successful in their careers at the expense of their relationships with their family. Some may have a great family but may be striving to make both ends meet. You see rich people flaunting their riches but are they really happy in the true essence of the word? You may see people who may have almost everything that money can buy but do you think they’re the happiest people this side of the planet?

I didn’t realize how lucky I was. I know my life isn’t perfect --- as I said, I’ve had my share of challenges and struggles yet I came out victorious. I simply slew the dragons of my life. You see, there will always be problems in my job, in my marriage, in our country, in our world but I know I’ll be okay. With my family as the source of my strength, I know I’ll get through this life unscathed.

Sometimes, life really sucks but I’ll get by especially when there’s family and friends around to share life’s bittersweet presents.

Monday, October 31, 2005

it's the time of the year...'s one of those events in a year that i look forward to!

it's the time of the year that i get to apply my wildest imaginations in coming up with the coolest and weirdest costumes. just for the record, i have always won "best in costume" awards during costume parties to include halloween and not to mention christmas parties and gs hour during my gs days...

'nuff said --- we don't have a grand halloween party planned in the office. but our hr turned our reception area into one spooky place --- we have cobwebs all over the place with rubber spideys hanging in them. we also have a miniature coffin on the side with lighted candles. we covered our visitor's chairs with white cloth and we got the orange pumpkin right on top of the reception counter. while the rest of cebu are having their holiday today and are heading to visit their dearly beloved departed in the cemeteries, most our us in the office are heading for work. since most of us will be working, we simply called it a spooky day --- thus, we come to the office in our spookiest halloween costume...let me share some of the pics.

me, alex and herbelle

nina, jenny and me -- biting off jenny's shoulderrrrrr

is that me??? takot akooooooo....

and this time with my boss - ms.O and belai

more pics to come...

until next out for me! hehehe

Tuesday, October 11, 2005

Way to go...BEACH ROOTS!!!

Now that Beach Roots is almost ready to fly, we just realized that we have abandoned our first business, the primary source of our living – our Pharmaceutical business. Having spent almost 100% of his time in the construction of the kiosk, government registration, purchasing and manpower sourcing, my husband just felt so overwhelmed. I’ve seen how passionate he was for the business. He thinks of it as his baby. He actually coined the idea which he shared with his friends. I’ve seen how excited he was for his idea to materialize.

Finally, the construction of the kiosk is close to finish. We’ve purchased almost all utensils and equipment needed. We just lack one more waiter to complete the service crew. We’re just counting the days and off we go.

I’m just saddened by the thought that we have exerted double effort on this business – that of my husband and mine. I, myself became involve in small ways. I find it unfair. I could have stayed in the house and spend some quality time with my daughter over the weekend. I wouldn’t have miss going to church for the past 3 consecutive Sundays. I would have rested my mind and body and brace myself for another work week. My husband often tells me that I shouldn’t involve myself much in the business because he would only get hurt because I shouldn’t be doing things his business partners or friends is expected to do. But my mantra would be “if I won’t do it then who else will?”

But why am I spending my vacant time at Mango Square when in fact I would have nothing out of this? Having 10 owners, it would take years to regain our investments not to mention the efforts we’ve exerted.

Maybe because we’re here for the fun, the camaraderie and the experience of putting up a business we so long wanted to have. It won’t be easy I know --- just like in any business that’s starting, there will always be birth pains. But it’s worth it especially when you see it thrive and grow into something grand.



Tuesday, October 04, 2005


We've been staying in our new home for almost a month now and so far, so good. It's just that we haven't completed organizing our stuff yet. We've been busy with the business my husband and his friends are putting up thus setting aside some of our domestic priorities.

Anyway, the previous house we've lived in Ma. Gochan, well, should I say was a nightmare. Actually, the place was conducive for dwelling. We had a vast garden where my daughter could run all day. We had a huge garage that can accommodate two vehicles. We had 3 large bedrooms and a basement that was more than enough for 10 people to live. Not to mention our spacious living room and dining area.

The place was almost PERFECT...EXCEPT for some thieves living just a few blocks from where we are. From time to time, we always experience our hanging clothes or some junk items in the garage being stolen. There were also instances where our light bulbs in our garage were stolen.

Just yesterday, my husband visited the house to return the keys to the owner. Much to their surprise, upon entering the house, a disgusting odor welcomed them. There were human waste scattered all over the place. The ceiling was totally wrecked. The circuit breaker was taken out and all the wires and bulbs were removed. The sink was on the verge of being uprooted. In the basement, all our junk monitors and keyboards were stolen and even my daughter's crib, stroller and walker were gone. And to think, our very own barangay hall and police station is just 5 meters away from our house.

I couldn't help myself but gasp in disbelief. How cruel of these people to do such a nasty thing. Why can't they just work their butts off and not steal from other people? It's also sad to note that our very own police and neighbors are just watching all these looting unfold before their very eyes. What's new???

On to the lighter side...

Beach Roots is opening NEXT WEEK!!!

After all drama and hysteria --- the dream would finally come true.

Well, this is just the beginning of more drama and hysteria...there's more to come!

Saturday, September 24, 2005

Friendship and Business

I always thought that sharing a business with your friends would come easy because of familiarity, trust, comfort and having to share the same interests. I WAS WRONG!

The past weeks have been so intense trying to put up our kiosk which we share with 8 of our friends. There were heated arguments over bottles of beer. There were bitter words against each other either upfront or behind each other’s back. There were businesses and jobs left behind. There were families and relationships set aside. There were other promises and commitments unfulfilled. There were tasks that remain unfinished. There was a lost of confidence in each other’s capability. AND THERE WAS A RUINED FRIENDSHIP!!!

The operation hasn’t even started but the problems over individual differences and diverse business principles seem to keep us apart and shatter the business. We started pointing fingers and blaming each other for our failures. We started counting the little contributions we’ve made without realizing the many times that we fail to do what is expected of us. We always look for faults in each other. We complain a lot. We argue over simple and myriad things which were time-consuming and a lot stressful. We wasted so much time. We waited to be told. We lack the initiative. We never acknowledge our mistakes. We never really cared about the business.

With due respect to some, who I believe is so passionate about making this business thrive, I guess there is still hope. Louie, being the captain of the ship should now start kicking butts off and demand commitment from everybody. We’re not mere employees in this business, WE OWN IT! It is but proper to start going the extra mile without compromising of course other priorities in life – family, work and health. The three should be the only acceptable excuses for failure to fulfill our commitments @ Beach Roots.

Argghhh, I have been a blabber box…apologies! But I just can’t help it having witnessed all the bickering and whining and complaining and fighting. Elvin said it’s HEALTHY but I totally disagree with him coz when friends start to argue and fight…man, there must be something wrong!

Oh well, I hope the friendship remains the same or else I shall never look forward to Bantayan escapade next summer...or to Jamaica perhaps?

Tuesday, September 20, 2005

We're Moving!!! (again...)

If there’s one thing that I really hate doing that would be moving out or transferring to a new home. Aside from the physical stress it brings, there’s also what you call the financial stress having to pay advance payments and deposits.

Yes, we’re moving again. During the entire 3 years of my married life, we’ve experienced moving on from one house to another for about four times. It’s just so tiring having to pack our things and unpack them again. It was quite easy during the first and second move but now that we have Alex, I never realized we’ve accumulated all these things. It’s just too many for our little family --- some are even junk and just simply nuisance. So, we’re trying to get rid of those things that we really don’t need. Give us a week and we’re done.

Despite the stress, I’m a bit happy with this move especially having to shed out only four thousand five hundred pesos a month for the rental and cut out on some of our utility bills. I like the way the house looks like. The three-bedroom house is just enough for four people (me, Earl, my sis and yaya) and a baby. I also like the place. We actually live across my in-laws houses (siblings, grandfather and aunt). It’s safer for my daughter and she would have lots of playmates then. I guess this will be our home in the next two years.

I just hope this will be the last after we finally move in to our new house that we loaned through Pag-ibig.

I’m taking some pictures of my daughter while we’re busy fixing our things in our new house.

--Alex busy fixing her toys--

-- Alex with her "Punk's not dead" pose courtesy of Tita Mike--

Saturday, September 10, 2005

Fat and Beautiful

I really don’t know what’s with being THIN that makes a person specifically a woman good to look at. Why is it that when one sees a fat person, one can’t help but notice and laugh? And why is it that almost always, fat people got the most jokes poke at them? Like in the office, we really have this overweight manager and every time she comes in, I could hear some of the guys whispering “naa lagi nakasulod nga dump truck sa office” or “hala, milinog” etc…etc.

The society has lots of biases against fat people. First and foremost, fashion is said to be for thin people only what with fashion designers’ lanky models in the ramp, television and magazines. You will never see a fat model in the ramp more so a fat mannequin in the department stores.

Second, when you’re fat, sometimes, jeepney drivers would just pass by you without letting you ride their vehicle. Why? Because when you’re big, you would occupy twice the usual seat allocation for a price of one.

Third, when you’re fat, you’ll less likely be admired by the opposite sex. It’s either you will remain the “best friend” or the “bridge” but never a lover or bearer.

Fourth, when you’re fat, you’ll get associated to a pig, ballena, Dabiana, Ike Lozada (God bless his soul) etc.

Some employers have some biases too especially in hiring people. There are some industries that have specific weight requirements and waistline requirements for some of the positions they’re hiring.

Why am I saying all these? Because I am fat.

Yes, and it has been my worst nightmare the past 2 years. Maybe I haven’t reached that point of accepting how I look right now. Because of my current figure, I became indifferent, insecure and my self-esteem went down. I have always been the tall and thin figure in the campus way back high school and college. I’ve wanted to go back to my figure when I was still single but my efforts are futile or it was not enough. I have nothing against fat people. I just find it unfair that being fat is like having a contagious disease or being fat is a crime.

Now, I realized that being this way is not a sin. There are a lot of things that I need to worry aside from my bulging tummy and huge legs. I don't care now --- and I believe that being fat doesn't neccesarily mean being ugly.

"I am beautiful, no matter what they say. Words can't bring me down. Don't you bring me down, today." (Christina Aguilera)

Friday, September 09, 2005


As you may have noticed, I had completely changed the template of my blog. Simple as it may seem but I guess I have added some “joie de vivre” to its entire look. I was kinda’ boring with my pink background and I purposely chose GREEN because it represents LIFE --- my LIFE in particular.

In as much as I want to use my artistic skills (*chukle*) in blogging, I am still in the period of exploring how this stuff really works. I admit, I’m no IT freak and I have the slightest idea how to make my blog site more or less fascinating in the eyes of my readers (as if people really read my articles…).

So much about that, BORA_BAI – our barkada-owned bar/kiosk at Mango Square Park will be opening SOON. Experience our “Freakin’ Cold Beer” and “Bisag Unsa Lang” lips smacking dishes while listening to Beach Boys and 50 First Dates soundtrack and more. Check out for more updates.

Friday, August 19, 2005

Now and then

Just recently, I got reunited with my college friends via email. It’s such a wonderful feeling hearing from them and knowing what their lives have been after college. Though we get to communicate from time to time through text or phone calls but the email thing was almost impossible what with Beth who is a self-proclaimed internet un-savvy.

After graduation, we went on our separate ways, trying to find a place in the community. Fresh from the cradles of STC, we were eager to spread our wings.

I landed a job at GS and stayed there for almost 5 years. Then I moved out and transferred to my present employer. I got married and had a kid. My life is not as exciting as that of my other classmates but I’m happy.

For a while, Beth and I became officemates in GS. She moved to another division before she decided to leave the job. She went to Manila and carved her future there. Beth’s life was dramatic. She lost her mom to cancer 3 years ago. She got herself pregnant to an “attached” man. Her many failures didn’t stopped her from chasing her dreams. I want her to come back to Cebu so I could watch over her every decisions.

Alvie is the only person in the barkada who went back to her roots. After college, she went home and took care of her ailing mom. She finished her Masters degree and earned some units in education. Right now, I am proud to say that Alvie started the Mass Communication curriculum in her high school alma mater. I also learned from her that she finally got a boyfriend ---- it’s her first.

Among us, Cecil has always been “the financially blessed” --- rich girl so to speak. Where is Cecil now? She’s in Dubai multiplying her riches. Talk about one lucky girl --- she also brags about her cute boyfriend. Hope to hear wedding bells soon…

Cathy --- she’s the baby in the group because she’s younger in age and in maturity. Like Alvie, Cathy also heeded the call of teaching. For a while, she worked in an accounting/ auditing firm as executive assistant. She gave up the position and proceeded to take on some units in education. She is now a full-pledged teacher in Indonesia. This girl’s getting married in January next year.

It has been more than five years and I just find it so amazing to know what life has been for the five of us – Beth, Alvie, Cecil, Cathy and me. Looking back when we first stepped in the corridors of STC, fears were building inside us but it vanished just seeing the warm smiles of these ladies we now call friends. College life was tough --- COM classes with Madam Abanto, history and philosophy classes, defending our thesis. But I bet, it was fun too --- photojournalism with Sir Ben, theater with Ms. Baad, Kilig Moments with Sir Leo, sportswriting with Sir Nimrod, lunches at the canteen, group study at the Greenhouse and library and some “leakages” from time to time, practicum at various media outfits. I just couldn’t imagine what college life would be having shared it with other set of friends. Sure, we had friends from other circles but the kind of friendship that we have was beyond the so-called friendship --- we were like sisters. We are each other’s source of strength. If it were not for each other, we wouldn’t have survived college life.
Thank you girls for being a part of my life! I know it would be difficult to bring back what we have before having lived separate lives now but it would be worthwhile to just bring back memories from time to time.

Please, let’s keep in touch!

Fresh from high pa!

so young and no more!

Wednesday, August 10, 2005

Everything I Need to Know I Learned through the Internet

Robert Fulghum once wrote a book entitled “All I Really Need to Know I Learned in Kindergarten”. It’s actually one of my favorite books. I also watched the play staged at the Ayala Center way back college days with Jessica Zafra, Kuya Bodgie (of Batibot) and two others in the lead role as kindergarten pupils.

I totally agree to Mr. Fulghum… These are the things we learned in kindergarten:

• Share everything.
• Play fair.
• Don't hit people.
• Put things back where you found them.
• Clean up your own mess.
• Don't take things that aren't yours.
• Say you're sorry when you hurt somebody.
• Wash your hands before you eat.
• Flush.
• Warm cookies and cold milk are good for you.
• Live a balanced life - learn some and think some and draw and paint and sing and dance and play and work every day some.
• Take a nap every afternoon.
• When you go out in the world, watch out for traffic, hold hands and stick together.
• Be aware of wonder. Remember the little seed in the Styrofoam cup: the roots go down and the plant goes up and nobody really knows how or why, but we are all like that.
• Goldfish and hamsters and white mice and even the little seed in the Styrofoam cup - they all die. So do we.
• And then remember the Dick-and-Jane books and the first word you learned - the biggest word of all - LOOK.
But just today, I realized that everything we need to know we learned through the internet particularly in yahoo and google.

While I was retrieving our CEO’s voicemail message, I came across a message with words I couldn’t quite understand. Since the caller mentioned his number, I tried to search using his number through yahoo search and by just clicking enter, came out what I was looking for.

The internet continues to fascinate me. All information from sports, arts, politics, parenting, entertainment, business, environment, news, fashion to even pornography, prostitution, poverty etc. can be found in the internet. I also find booking our travels in the internet hassle free. On-line shopping for just about anything is also fun. On-line banking is also one of the best things that internet has brought to make our lives easier and faster. The onset of email makes you communicate with your friends and loved ones in seconds. Although, I’m not into chatting and video-conferencing (except during meetings with our bosses in Philadelphia), I know it has brought wonders to the Filipinos having met their would-be spouses on-line. It’s the most effective medium used nowadays…you can advertise your products and services via the internet. You can create your own website. You can locate your friends via “friendster”. And this blog thing? I couldn’t imagine thousands of people reading my blog articles --- as if it’s really this interesting! *chuckle*

The internet has brought a lot of WONDERS into our lives.

I still believe that all I need to know I learned in kindergarten but I guess you would agree with me that everything we need to know we learned through the internet.

Friday, August 05, 2005

Sh*t Happens

We always have what you call “a bad day” and I just had mine.

Incident # 1:
I went to Pag-ibig Fund yesterday afternoon to follow up on a document needed to complete my Housing Loan requirements. It’s the 4th time that I’ve been there in just two weeks. I’ve had problems with my name that’s why they asked to me to have it certified by my current employer that I use MARIA LOURDES instead of MA. LOURDES. The 3rd time that I was there was to submit the certification so I thought I could get the document I need having complied with the certification. They told me that there’s another discrepancy in my name and that I would need another certification that my middle names when I was still single and the middle name now belongs to one and the same person. This is crazy. Why can’t they just tell me what I need to comply once and for all so I won’t waste my time? I’ve been going undertime from work just to finish this and until now it isn’t done. Grrrr!!!

Incident # 2:
I went to the grocery right after I went to Pag-ibig. I usually pay using my credit card for grocery so I could still utilize my cash for some other purposes. When the cashier swipes my card, the machine didn’t honor it. I just paid my account last Friday and it’s kinda’ impossible that Citibank would decline my card. There are several people waiting on the line so I have no choice but to pay in cash. And that means having to use my two weeks allowance. I went home with only P50 in my wallet. Arrgghh!!!

Incident # 3:
I just learned from our other helper that my daughter’s yaya has been stealing some of our clothes. She told me that our yaya has been keeping some of my daughter’s clothes. I’ve been hearing stories like this before like she’s using some of my personal stuff (make-up, nail polish, bath stuff, facial creams etc.) but I just brush it off. It really doesn’t matter to me as long as she’s doing well in her job and that my daughter is well taken cared of. She’s leaving at the end of this month coz her husband wants her to go home. I really don’t know how to deal with her. I want to confront her but still I am hesitant coz I’m afraid she might get back to me through my daughter. I don’t know why she’s doing this to me. I have always been nice to my yayas – I mean I never scold them and I always treat them as my partner in raising my kid. This time around, I guess I have to be a little stiff in dealing with them.

As they say, sh*t really happens all the time. Its how you deal with them that really matters. I should say that I am still sensible enough to have handled the above incidents with style. I am not the type of person who becomes hysterical and scandalous in front of other people. It’s not everyday that you see me really mad. Today is just too much to handle. Just 3 incidents and I’ve had it.

Wednesday, August 03, 2005

3rd Year Wedding Anniversary

A successful marriage requires falling in love many times, always with the same person. ~ Germaine Greer

Exactly three years ago today is my wedding day. It’s supposed to be one of the most special days of my life. Indeed, it was!

Exactly three years ago today is the day I walked down the aisle towards the altar of San Lorenzo Ruiz Parish to meet the man who I will spend the rest of my life with in richer and in poorer, in sickness and in health until death separates us.

I admit, if it wasn’t for Baby Alex, we wouldn’t have been together. Alex was the reason why we got married in the first place. We already broke up before I learned that I’m pregnant. It was difficult to convince him and that’s when I decided that I have to move on whether he will take responsibility over the baby or not. Yes, he proposed to me in December over the phone and with the spirit of alcohol all over him – I took it as a big joke. The wedding in August was totally unexpected aside from Earl being undecided about me and the baby. But I never forced him to marry me. NEVER! Perhaps, God has His own way of completing the puzzle of my life. He used instruments in the form of FAMILY and FRIENDS for making the wedding event possible. God poured His blessings during the course of our wedding preparations.

Yes, it’s been 3 years since I got married to Earl. The past 3 years wasn’t easy though. We had our share of trials, disappointments, insecurities and challenges. It was difficult adjusting to each other’s differences and frailties. Yet we also had a taste of what it is to be in love and share your life with to somebody.

If feels great to have reached this year. I thought we will never last this far.

For the past three years…

• we bicker a lot
• we fought a lot
• we cried a lot
• we laugh a lot
• we hurt each other so much
• we even got to the point of separation
• we almost give up

Earl and I had a lot of differences between us.

• I am romantic, he isn’t.
• He loves to party on weekends while I prefer to stay at home (but I do unwind from time to time).
• He hates paper work while I can devour on paperwork all day.
• He’s always late on most of our appointments while I’ll see to it that I’m always on time.
• He talks a lot his mouth is like a machine gun when he’s mad. I don’t talk when I’m mad.
• He loves rock music while my ears settle for soothing music.
• He’s an impulsive buyer and I’m not (because I don’t have that much money).
• He’s rich and I’m poor.

But we also share a lot of commonalities and sameness.

• We both love pizza and pasta.
• We both love the same food.
• We both are ukay-ukay fanatics.
• We both have the same idea of our house.
• We both love the beach.
• We both like the color “black”.
• We both want to loose weight.
• We both aspire for the same thing for our family.
• We both love our baby so much.

Exactly three years ago today, I made the most rightful decision of my life and I have no regrets. I admit, there came a point when I wanted to give up and let go. But my faith in this love and marriage has strengthened me to hold on tight and simply enjoy the ride. Sometimes, the road may be smooth and sometimes I would stumble upon several humps and rocky road. But the thought of having someone holding your hand makes the journey worthwhile.

Happy 3rd Year Anniversary Dad!!!

I guess I need not say more how much you mean to me… It has been such a wonderful 3 years and I look forward to more adventures with you on this journey.

I love you.

"Grow Old Along with Me"

Saturday, July 16, 2005

Small World

The freezing temperature in the office is already getting into my nerves and my bones. It’s extremely cold in the office and no wonder a lot of people are catching some fever and colds the past weeks – we almost ran out of biogesic and neozep in the clinic. Good thing, I have with me my shawl and maternity fats to at least shield me from cold.

I was just staring blankly at my computer without the slightest idea of what to post. It’s Friday afternoon (Eastern Time) and there’s not much to do. I have to set aside some tasks until next week…at least I won’t be idle by then hehehe… talking about procrastination huh!

Anyway, I always make it a point to post at least one article per week. But now, it seems that my mind isn’t working (as usual). I don’t wanna talk about politics and the quandary of the Philippines right now etcetera, etcetera. While Manila is on the streets wanting to oust pgma, Cebu is celebrating and declaring full support of the president. After all, Manila is not the Philippines…hey, we still have the majority of Filipinos in the Visayas and Mindanao and that’s quite a number huh…now, I’m talking about politics…Grrrr!!!

The population in the office ballooned to almost 300 heads just this month from close to a hundred when it started a year ago so there are a lot of new faces coming in. I was a bit amazed at how some of these people are one way or the other interrelated to me or to people close to me. You call it “friendster” – friend mo, friend ko, friend nating lahat….check out the connectivity below:

•Officemate 1: Fritzie – former officemate in GS; batchmate of my husband in highschool.
•Officemate 2: Tox – batchmate of my husband in highschool
•Officemate 3: Brad – classmate of my brother-in-law in college; boyfriend of my husband’s classmate in USC.
•Officemate 4: Paolo – friend of my brother-in-law.
•Officemate 5: Kyle – ex-boyfriend of somebody in know in STC.
•Officemate 6: Gela – cousin of my husband’s employee.
•Officemate 7: Christine – batchmate of my husband in USC.
•Officemate 8: Jay – used to be a former applicant in GS; I’ve interviewed him several times.
•Officemate 9: Vilma – girlfriend of my husband’s cousin.
•Officemate 10: Odette – my boss and a good friend of my former boss.
•Officemate 11: Mars – a classmate in college.
•Officemate 12: Azela – a masscom student in STC who taught us our cheers during the intramurals.

Bottom line is, we just have to be good to all the people we meet everyday. It’s a small world after all and the people we meet today might be the same people we meet 10 to 20 years from now. I don’t know if I make sense. My brains isn’t working anymore…I’m so sleepy from the graveyard shift. Good grief, it’s finally over for a while and I’d better sleep the whole day today to recharge for tonight’s night out with my officemates and the girls.

Night. *ngork*

nocturnal beauty Posted by Picasa

Wednesday, July 06, 2005

Weekend Party

My current employer (I won’t mention the name) turned a year older last Saturday. From Philadelphia, Pennsylvania our American-Canadian CEO (I won’t mention his name too) brought to Cebu, Philippines this big time print-on-demand publishing company to the delight of the Cebuanos. Well of course, this company now serves as the “milking cow” of our family and has somehow helped the ailing Philippine economy..

The celebration was a blast and indeed “bongacious”. We had Ratsky all to ourselves between 5 – 9 PM and even beyond. And we party like there’s no tomorrow.

It’s good to see our top executives (especially Americans) let down their hair and showed their out-of-this world dance steps.

Funny how we complain about our leaders and the company yet we savor and partake in every success and milestones of the company.

Anyway, here are the pics… Enjoy!

the executive support team with A. Wood and way apil nga IT guy... Posted by Picasa

with john fidler...goodbye! Posted by Picasa

with dave weinman Posted by Picasa

Thursday, June 23, 2005

So Long, Tropa

Promise, this will be my last write up about the issue. I’ve been writing topics about cheating and hurting and moving on since I started my blog in March. Sure, it’s an interesting topic to write but its kinda’ distressing especially when you know so well the people involved. It even came to a point when my own relationship was affected since I tend to stereotype men including my own husband as cheaters and has this hobby playing with somebody else’s feelings.

Or was I just trying to sensationalize events the way showbiz people do? I know for a fact that it has been tough especially for the people directly or indirectly involved.

Everything seems to be ok these past weeks after that dreadful night in Vudu. We started to go out again as a group or should I say --- as a family. But then, there are just these crazy people trying to destroy this family --- people outside the circle. What makes it more painful though is that there are those who rightfully belong to this family who in one way or another supports the destruction. The same people we considered “friends” who without any bit of regret just took this family for granted.

I know things will never be the same again. I, for one no longer wants to be associated with this group (except to my husband of course!). I couldn’t help but feel sorry for what could’ve been a wonderful family. Sayang!

Da Vinci’s club will continue to hang-out… that’s for sure. But the “tropa”? Naaahhh!

Before I finally wrap up this post, I have no regrets having met these people:

The girls

wounded soul

joni (2nd from right)
one lucky momma

survivor and fighter

drama queen

The Guys

my honest to goodness husband

inconsistent… uncertain

life of a party…user?

Ahloie – cheater; fucker

Eden (1st from left)
RnB guy…Johnny Bravo for life

Louie (1st from right)
the most sensible person in the group

I don’t wanna jump into conclusions though…Maybe it isn’t over yet…. I’m still hopeful that there’s a light at the end of the tunnel and that in time issues will be resolved.

Friday, June 17, 2005

Struggle of the Brainless

I was trying to pick up my brain, browsing through it’s hemispheres for what seemed like an unintelligent week

The week was spent mostly on booking travels for Expats going in and out of the country. It was an easy task though but the rapid changes in airline rates and schedules from on-line travel agents made me melodramatic for a while it almost gave me a heart attack. Philadelphia to San Francisco flight rate soared from $ 359 to $ 1,069 in a span of 2 hours --- this is crazy! And one more thing, travelocity made me pay $100 cancellation fee for a flight that was never booked/finalized. I almost burst into tears having to pay that amount. Good thing, my boss was so rich she's willing to shoulder the amount of P5K ++.

It has also been a women-empowered week. Alas, the Da Vinci’s Club gathered around for the first time. ‘Twas fun having no husbands/boyfriends around during our night-out. Imagine 4 mouths talking incessantly the entire evening --- what have you got after? Sore throat.

The week was also filled with exaggeration of a friend feeling bitter for missing a spontaneous barkada outing over the weekend. ‘Nuff said --- shallow as it may seem but we just have to understand these types of people. After all, a true friend accepts and understands each other’s differences.

Whew, that was tough… Somehow, after this week, I am still very much sane.

Looking forward to Father's Day, Batman Begins, Mr. & Mrs. Smith, Da Vinci's Club convention and UK. Yahoooooo...

Wednesday, June 01, 2005


Last weekend was a blast!

Events were intertwined like scenes from a tele-novela.

Imagine this…

Farewell party for X-GF @ Vudu with some friends. Current GF (let’s call her PSYCHO BITCH or PB) was also there with some of her own friends. I was with X-GF. I texted my husband to pick me up @ Vudu. Husband came along with “THE GUY” or TG. TG didn’t join PB and instead joined X-GF coz he just broke with PB and wanted to go back to X-GF (his GF for 8 years…). PB got very mad and went out of the bar. PB went to Frontgate where TG’s car was parked. PB picked up a huge stone and smashed it in the windshield of TG’s car. Frontgate staff pointed PB as the culprit. I left Vudu early with my husband and his male friends including TG to grab a bite. TG seemed bothered and had this feeling that something bad really happened to his car. TG asked a friend to drive him to Frontgate. He then discovered what happened of his car. We went to Fuente Police Station to report the incident and then went to PB’s house to talk to her parents. We waited for PB to come home. She arrived together with her friends at 5 in the morning.

Unknowingly,while we were at Fuente Police Station, PB went back to Vudu and confronted X-GF. X-GF seemed not affected at all since she has given up long before TG to PB.

Until now, TG still tries to win back X-GF. And PB? She can go to hell…or I think she’s in hell now. Haha!


I had the longest weekend. It’s Memorial Day in the US so I need not report on May 30. I had some bonding session with my daughter.

We watched “Madagascar” together with my younger sisters. It’s my daughter’s first time to watch a movie on the big screen. I guess she was enjoying the movie a lot even if she doesn’t understand the dialogues yet. She got the same name that of the lion “Alex”.

I enjoyed the movie too…made me forgot that there’s one soul whose mad at me that very day -– my husband. I need not elaborate why he’s mad at me. Hhhhmmm… but we’re ok now! You know, you really can’t avoid some disagreements between couples. It’s as a normal as making love. Hehe


I’ve been spending a lot of time with X-GF lately. She’s leaving for Dumaguete on Wednesday. She will be assigned there for good I guess. I’m having some mixed emotions. I’m happy that she could finally escape from all pain that PB and TG has brought her life with. I’m happy that she’s now far from all the mess that this love triangle has brought about. I just hope that the horrible events during the past months and weeks won’t haunt her.

But, her leaving makes me sad too. I have already developed a certain kind of friendship with her that is way beyond the usual friendships. She helped me overcome my insecurities and she has contributed to my new outlook in life and relationship. She’s one lady you’ll truly admire that despite all the cheating and pain, she doesn’t keep any hatred in her heart. She has opened a lot of doors for me and I’m truly grateful. I’m so lucky to have her as my friend. Huhuhu…I will miss her terribly!

Thursday, May 26, 2005

Everything happens for a good reason

This is just one of those forwarded emails that landed in my inbox today. I just want to post it as it might touch another person's heart the way it touched mine.


Sometimes people come into your life and you know right away that they were meant to be serve some sort of purpose, teach you a lesson or
help figure out who you are or who you want to become. You never know who these people may be but you lock eyes with them, you know that very moment that they will affect your life in some profound way.

And sometimes things happen to you at the time that may seem horrible, painful and unfair, but in reflection you realize that without overcoming those obstacles you would never realize your potential, strength, will power or heart.

Without these small tests, life would be like a smoothly paved, straight, flat road to nowhere safe and comfortable but dull and utterly pointless.

The people you meet affect your life. The successes and downfalls that you experience can create whom you are, and the bad experiences can be learned
from. In fact they are probably the most poignant and important ones. If someone hurts you, betrays you or breaks your heart, forgive them because they have helped you learn about trust and the importance of being cautious to whom you open your heart.

If someone loves you, love them back unconditionally, not only because they love you, but also because they are teaching you to love and open your heart and eyes to little things. Make every day count. Appreciate everything that you possibly can, for you may never experience it again.

Talk to people whom you have never talked to before, and actually listen. Let yourself fall in love, break free and set your sights high. Hold you head up because you have every right to.

Tell yourself you are a great individual and believe in yourself, for if you don't believe in yourself, no one else will believe in you. Create you own life and then go out and live it.

Share this with anyone whom you believe has made a difference in your life!

"If you take your eyes off your goals, all you see is obstacles."


Speaking of life's obstacles...I've considered my gaining weight as one of my obstacles and it has made me insecure and paranoid. I'm taking my last anti-obesity pill today after 2 weeks. Yes, after several sales talk from my medrep friend from Abbot Lab, I've finally decided to take this "million dollar pill" (P1,400 for 14 pills). At least, I'm paying it on installment basis, hahaha. No regrets though, as of today, I've counted the people who said that I loose weight...there are 7 of them. I need 14 people to tell me to match the 14 pills...hahaha. I'm still contemplating of getting another set of pills to totally trim down. Esep-esep muna... ;)

Thursday, May 19, 2005


My daughter,Alex is fond of posing in front of a camera - may it be a camera phone or an ordinary camera. At 2 years old, she already knows how to strike a pose. She also knows when her dress is new and she keeps on looking at herself in the mirror. She loves to wear shades and my shoes and some of my accessories. I don't know if I would be happy seeing her this way...a part of me is afraid. She's already "kikay" if you would call it. But I also find it amazing coz she's into a lot of things: plays with her ukelele and drums, sings with some rock and alternative songs her dad often plays (with a headbang pa!)and of course her nursery rhyme songs, dances to various dance tunes (chocolate, chopeta, even the "joy dishwashing" commercial), memorizes the A-B-C and numbers 1 to 10, talks to her teddy bears and dolls as if they're real...but she also has her tantrums and bratty ways lately. Still, I'm proud of her...see her pics below:

poser # 1

poser # 2

poser # 3

Tuesday, May 17, 2005


I'm back!!!

Over the weekend, the “TROPA” convened again but this time not anymore by the beach but over the hills and mountains. We were invited by Elvin to some remote barrio down South called Napo, Carcar, Cebu. It’s their annual fiesta in honor of their patron saint – San Isidro Labrador. We stayed in his mom’s ancestral home which was built 100 years ago. At first glance, the house looks scary and the place reminds us of “Shake, Rattle & Roll” movies.

Anyway, it was pretty exciting. Globe and Smart signals couldn’t reach the area and it’s a relief coz nobody will pester us with calls and texts. But we were bum for a few hours as there’s not much to do in the province except to listen to the sound of the crickets. The guys started their drinking session and mahjong. Ei and I were entertained by my daughter Alex who as usual was fully charged and has been very restless. And of course, there are always those silly jokes and pranks being thrown at the table when the tropa is around.

Past 11pm, we were dressed and ready to party the Napo-way. And as in any fiesta, it will never be complete without those “discorall or baile” or as the guys call it “sadsad”. My daughter was still wide awake so we have no choice but to tag her along. It was a milestone for her. At 2 years old, she already had her first night out with mom and dad. With the huge speakers right beside where we were seated, my only job was to sit down and cover her ears. The rest of the guys were already dancing while Ei and just sat down.

Fortunately, my little girl dozed off to sleep. Maybe it was because of the music or she was just very tired. We sent her back to the Elvin’s house– good thing Hailey’s yaya is still awake. So, we left her with yaya and the rest of the kids sleeping. We’re not bad parents --- we just love to party huh! We went back to the “discorall” and started shaking our booties… or was it bragging about our dance steps from out of this world? Kevin’s dance steps were sure real cool what with his salamander steps. Way’ makalupig--- not even Ahloie’s aerobics steps. Hahaha…these guys are really funny. They’re like 5-year olds.

We started drinking ---uh oh! Not again...Beer na pod, Red Horse pa gyud! Lingaw bya...especially when people look crazy when they're drunk...I still consider myself veteran in this drinking challenge. I think with the neverending "tagay", i may have consumed already around 5 - 6 bottles of red horse.

The good thing with beer is that you'll never get hang-over the following if nothing really happened the previous night.

Well, folks, that's all for now...again, nothing beats this "tropa"... i just hope the friendship continues even if we're lolos and lolas --- may we still continue to hang-out but this time with our "apos".

Tuesday, May 10, 2005

Mother's Day

Last Sunday, May 8 was Mother’s Day!

To be exact, I am a mother for 3 years and 1 month (including the nine months of bearing Alex inside my tummy). And for the past 3 years, I have learned so much about motherhood.

I have learned that it’s not easy being a mother and that babies don’t come with a manual or guide when they come out. I have learned to be very patient in dealing with my little toddler – very patient to the extent that even if I want to strangle her, I just force myself a smile and say “Alex, stop it” (with teeth gnashing). I have learned that what my mother said about motherhood is so very true – you’ll only appreciate your own mother when you become one. I have learned to be creative in entertaining my little angel --- make funny faces, a little acrobat, trying to figure out nursery rhymes from time immemorial and a lot more tricks just to soothe her. I have learned that mommies play different roles in a child’s life --- a superhero to drive away monsters, a teacher to teach ABC, a singer to sing the lullaby during bedtime, a dancer to pacify a baby crying, an artist to draw images animals and flowers and a child at heart to accept and understand her child wholeheartedly.

I wasn’t given any tribute or gift from my daughter on Mother’s Day – maybe because she still cannot appreciate my existence in her life. She was mimicking though the Surf commercial “Salamat Sa’yo Nanay” jingle. I find it really funny.

For now, I’ll try to be a good mother to her in any way I can. I want to make her feel that she is important to me more than anybody else – even more than her dad hehehe. Having her in my life makes me really COMPLETE. She’s an angel and I’m just happy having her around.

And to my mama, happy mother’s day! I hope you’ll be proud of me being a mother. I know I still have a lot to learn about this stuff and I hope you never cease to give me the support I need.

Friday, May 06, 2005


It’s my parents 27th Wedding Anniversary today.

It’s amazing how they’ve come this far in their marriage. I salute them for raising 5 smart and well-mannered kids (I’m one of them you know…the first in the list hehehe). Being the eldest in the family, I’ve witnessed how they face the challenges in their marriage –- bitches, alcohol, finances, kids, work, unemployment, sickness to name a few.

But all these years, they were true to the vow they made before God and man that they will hang on to each other in sickness and in health, for richer and for poorer until death would finally part them. So many times I’ve heard my mother wanting to quit and leave my father but God has a way of bringing them together.

I could still feel their love for each other even if they fight so often like cats and dogs. What made their bond even stronger is their faith and devotion to the Holy Family and the Most Holy Virgin. Their steadfast love continues to inspire other families in our community.

I will always be proud to have them as my parents. I am proud because despite all the odds, our family is in-tacked.

I am in my 2nd year of marriage going 3rd and yet I wanted to give up this early. I guess, what I’m experiencing right now is just a bit of what my parents have experienced for the past 27 years. I still need to learn a lot from their relationship…

Congrats Mamsi, Papsi...May you celebrate more years in your marriage!!!

Thursday, April 28, 2005

Pet Peeves

It’s been a while. There’s not much stories to tell…Been experiencing some melancholia, paranoia and little hysteria over trivial matters to some people but may mean a lot to me.

I’m caught up with my emotions. My heart seems to burst in anger. I don’t know why…maybe it’s because of fear of being alone or left out or being replaced by some sexy college flame who has the making of a talk show host - Oprah. I’ve been really affected by several events lately of indifferent husband who seem to care less and talks about cheating boyfriends. As they say, some good things never last long or maybe they’ll be gone for a little while and reappear after several ages. Whatever happen to…?

1. I love you’s
2. Sweet text messages
3. Flowers on Valentines Day
4. Surprise date at Tops
5. Ride to and from the office
6. Movie for two
7. Bear Hug
8. A little squeeze on the hand
9. A kiss
10. Dinner for two

Little things that mean so much in a relationship… or was it me who turned sour? Or I am damn unpretty to be given much attention to? Or there’s some other girls out there – drop dead gorgeous, fresh smelling, enchanting and vibrant girl in friendster or in the hospital? Perhaps I’m just insecure and I don’t feel good about myself. Oh, I hate this feeling! I don’t even have the guts to tell him straight what I’m feeling right now. I don’t know how he would react… haaayyy!!! He seemed out of reach lately…busy acquiring money…in exchange for supposed-to-be time spent with wife and daughter. How could he just brush us off his schedule? We never really fight --- the last time we fought was October of last year because of the same issue I am complaining right now. It reached the point where I packed up my things, brought Alex with me and left him for days.

The jokes they poke about “being married” and “married life” are indeed funny but TRUE.

I’m ashame… I shouldn’t be revealing this kind of stuff to the whole world, but you see I feel a lot better after writing all these stuff.

Chill out Mhalou!!!

DISCLAIMER: I sound like a totally pathetic fool in this post...and I probably am.I wrote this since Monday but was contemplating of posting it or not. But hell yes, I did...Naahhh! I would appreciate "no comments" this time. A piece of advice will do. You think I need pyschiatric treatment? I'll be okey... ;D

Thursday, April 21, 2005

All Apologies

“Mommy, embrace…nooooooohhh!” My daughter screamed at the top of her lungs on my way out of the house for work this morning. Even when I am almost out of her sight, I could still hear her cry. I feel I don’t deserve being called “mommy”… I was never there.

To Baby Alex…
alex bibo

I’m sorry if I doze off to sleep while we’re watching Barney together. I must’ve been tired from work.

I’m sorry if I don’t get to feed you on time because I am still sound asleep from the graveyard shift.

I’m sorry if I have a hard time figuring out what food you like to eat.

I’m sorry if I miss some of your new tricks, new songs learned, new words spoken and new dance steps.

I’m sorry if until now you still didn’t have your potty training and I get irritated when changing your nappy.

I’m sorry if I fail to let you take your daily dose of vitamins and your medicines when you’re sick.

I’m sorry if I don’t get to give you your bath often.

I’m sorry if I don’t get to fix your hair. You don’t want it fix anyway.

I’m sorry for the times that I miss your laughter and for the times that I neglect your tears.

I’m sorry if I don’t get to bring you to Timezone or Play House more often.

I’m sorry for the times that I fail to see you grow.

I want to let you know that I love you so much and I’ll make it up for those missed moments every weekend. That I can assure you! You be good to Mama Daisy ha and stop talking about your ex-yaya jin2. We’ll get your new yaya soon but mommy will be around always. Swear!



My mama's turning 57 today. I guess it’s her first time to celebrate it away from home and to celebrate it here in Cebu together with her two lovely daughters – Mhalou & Magee. I still can’t figure out how to celebrate her birthday today. I have a variety of choices – massage, dinner or shopping BUT I don’t have money right now. Huh!

I know, mama will understand. She has always been very understanding and a caring one too. Thanks for everything Ma! I know I will not be the same person I am now without you. I love you!

Saturday, April 16, 2005

Letting go and moving on...

What would you do when the person you want to spend your lifetime with wouldn’t want to spend it with you?

What would you do when the person who promised you the moon and the stars broke his promises?

What would you do when the person you love continue to love you but still afford to also love somebody else?

What would you do when the person you love the most is the same person who has brought you pain and suffering?

The answer to these questions my friend is MOVE ON without that person.

In a relationship, one of the hardest things to do is saying goodbye. It is hard as breaking a crystal because you don’t know if you can pick all the pieces again. Moving on after a relationship is easier said than done. It takes a leap of faith and a lot of strength to let go of a person who may have occupied a very special spot in your heart for quite sometime.

But then, what’s the point of holding on?

Holding on will only cause us more pain. Haven’t we left something of ourselves? More often, we prefer to hurt ourselves and cling on to a lost love hoping to ignite the fire back. But sometimes, love is not always what we expect it to be. Love has its own ways we can never understand – it’s mysterious. We just have to accept that love has long been gone beyond our control.

For a while, we will grieve for a lost love and cry ourselves to sleep. But we have to cry to let go of the pains in our hearts. It’s just temporary and I know there’s somebody out there who would give us more love and respect.

As Melanie Lim explicitly say, “If he can’t see you as a better woman, then maybe, there’s a better man out there for you”.

This post is dedicated to a dear friend. You know who you are…huh, pikat na lang nila mam!!!

My graveyard shift is almost over. I’m gonna miss some of the nocturnal office creatures for a week. God, I’m so tired and stressed with all the news on some of our Philadelphia colleagues recently fired from their jobs. I think I need a day in the spa this weekend to lift up my spirits. Need some sponsors please! Calling Earl Vincent… ;-)

Friday, April 15, 2005

The Wedding Dress

I’ve been subscribed to online Chicken soup for the soul. Its stories continue to inspire me and made me ponder on life sometimes. Today’s soup was a story of a lady named Nora E. Kessel. It’s entitled “Priceless”. It’s remembering the day she went shopping for a wedding gown with her mom and how they found that gown really meant for her. According to the author, the moment burrowed its way into her heart and her memory. She also relate in her story when years later she had a yard sale and there’s this mother looking for a prom dress for her daughter. She offered her wedding dress instead which was never part of the yard sale. She was so touched by the lovely lady (the daughter of the woman) now trying her own wedding gown.

I can very well relate to this story…not in the sense that I went shopping for my wedding gown with “mama”. It’s the other way around though coz she was never there during my wedding preparations. Earl and I were on our own preparing for a wedding we never had before (well of course!) - From planning the entourage to designing our wedding invitations to buying faux silver wedding rings. There were little help though from some friends and relatives but mostly on Earl’s side. My family was never supportive of my getting married early at an age of 23 and Earl at 24.Thus, we were left on our own…and that will remain forever since we made that vow before God and man.

wedding pics with friends and principal sponsors...

But I couldn’t blame my parents for caring less about my getting married. I truly understand them, though it would’ve been wonderful if they were involved. No regrets…it was still a wedding made in heaven.

My mama’s visiting me tomorrow with my younger sister whose taking the freshman entrance exam in USC. I’m looking forward to going shopping with her (not for another wedding dress huh!). When she visits Cebu, SM is always the store for her new purchases of house wares and kitchen utensils. My mama loves to cook and she cooks well that’s why there’s a bunch of kitchen stuff at home and it’s adding up. I’m planning to bring her to Carbon this Sunday for some ukay2 shopping spree. I’m pretty sure she’ll enjoy it the way I do. Like mother like daughter noh! Cheapskate…hehehe

Wednesday, April 13, 2005

Love Moves in Mysterious Ways

“Love Moves in Mysterious Ways” by Julia Fordham has always been my ultimate favorite song. Whether you agree with me or not, it will always be the most beautifully written song of all time. I am greatly moved and touched by its lyrics and Julia’s voice added perfection to the song.

Just recently, I’ve heard Nina (younger sister of King) sang the song and it just pissed me off. I never really liked Nina ever since – the way she talks and dresses and everything. I find her “maarte”…my apologies to Nina’s fans! I know, I know – it’s just not fair to judge her. She has a good voice quality though and at least she gave justice to Julia’s song. She fairly did a good job...fairly!

So guys, give it up for JULIA FORDHAM…and Nina too!

"Who'd have thought this is how the pieces fit
You and I shouldn't even try making sense of it
I forgot how we ever came this far
I believe we had reasons but I don't know what they are
Don't blame it on my heart, oh

Love moves in mysterious ways
It's always so surprising
When love appears over the horizon
I'll love you for the rest of my days
But still it's a mystery
How you ever came to me
Which only proves
Love moves in mysterious ways

Heaven knows love is just a chance we take
We make plans but then love demands a leap of faith
So hold me close and never never let me go
'Cos even though we think we know which way the river flows
That's not the way love goes, no

(Repeat chorus)

Like the ticking of a clock two hearts beat as one
But I'll never understand the way it's done, oh

(Repeat chorus)

Love moves... in mysterious ways...."

Wait till you hear me sing the song of these days, I'll have the guts to sing it at Frontgate. Gosh, that's next to impossible...I love to sing but I was never gifted with such heavenly voice. My husband is or maybe he has the guts to sing infront of a crowd. I'm used to singing within the comforts of our bathroom but never infront of a lot of people. I have tried though but with a few bottles of beer hehehe.

Let's see... :D

Friday, April 08, 2005

Random Thoughts...

I didn't get much sleep last daughter was having this I-DON'T-KNOW-WHAT'S-WRONG-WITH-HER thing last night and she was crying like hell until 3am. She doesn't want her daddy to go to sleep...Earl's getting impatient and wanted to throw her out of the house. Maybe she just missed her yaya so much...she's been like this for several days now since we fired her yaya last week. I admit she was more close to her yaya than me...I hate being a working mom!

Some things never change...talked to an old friend the other day. I used to call her "Baki" and she used to call me "Balot" when we were kids...we still talk incessantly just like the old times. It's sad to know that her marriage didn't seems like she just got married last year and there she is now struggling to be a single mom. I'm trying to get her to replace one of my colleague who will resign at the end of the month...

TGIF na sad...but i'm quite sad, my husband's leaving for Cagayan de Oro tonight. It's kinda' lonesome spending the weekend without him. He's travelling to Cagayan every other week for some important meetings with his father. He's also processing our housing loan in Cagayan...talking about relocation. I don't know his plans yet...hhhmmm...I think Cagayan would be a nice place to live.

Tuesday, April 05, 2005

More Bantayan pics...

booze on a black saturday...always a daddy's girl...
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Familia Cutie @ Bantayan
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On Cheating...

I decided to go back to my weekly after-office regimen-- TAEBO. It makes me sick seeing those sexy girls this summer. We still have one summer outing at the end of this month in Camiguin and I swear I'll wear that black bikini displayed at Rustans (whether my husband agrees or not). I wanted to have my high school figure back 24-30-25..I know that's next to impossible because I've tried almost all unthinkable ways of trimming down (pill, dieting to death, gym, extreme sports, extreme sex haha...) except lipo of course but still I'm this HUGE...I don't even want to know my vital stats now.

My friend picked me up in the office while my husband was waiting at the Sports Center. He's also doing his daily jog. While on our way, my friend showed me an email she retrieved from her boyfriend's email account. It was from the "girl" he was having an affair with. That bit**...they're still seeing and communicating w/ each other after all those broken promises from my friend's boyfriend. I can feel that my friend is hurting. She's been with the guy for 8 years going 9 but was interrupted with her boyfriend's cheating. I know the "girl"...she used to hang out with us also and I just hate it coz I know my friend don't even have the slightest idea that her boyfriend is hooking with this bit**. Anyway, I don't meddle with their problem though...I'll be more than happy to see my friend happy with some faithful guy.

The guy is my husband's friend (the same group that went to Bantayan). When I opened up the issue to my husband -- I got a sermon from him saying that I should not be involve with other people's lives. I just can't help but see, I'm a woman and I can feel the pain that my friend is having right now. Eight years is eight years...that's almost a lifetime for me. I know this may sound bias but my friend is a nice lady. She's very pretty and with a good reputation to brag about. That other girl has been noted for her being a "manizer" (opposite of womanizer hehe). Maybe there's just something about this bit**...maybe there's something that my friend doesn't have...

All I know, this guy just didn't realize that he has wealth under his nose (it's not bogger or sip-on ha!)...he may not realize it now but I know soon...he will have a dose of his own medicine and I know he'll regret what he has done to my friend.

Saturday, April 02, 2005

For Joey...As requested

My elementary classmate, Joey, asked me to post an entry on some information about Bantayan Island. Well, here it is...this is based on experience and some info from the internet.

How to get there?

From Cebu City: You can take a bus (from North Bus Terminal) going to Hagnaya. You can choose between aircon and non-aircon buses that are leaving Cebu City daily. It's about 2 hours travel with bus fare at around 60 - 75 pesos (basta not more than P100). Or you can take Seair from Mactan Airport. (i have no idea of the airfare)

From Hagnaya: You take a boat ride about an hour going to Sta. Fe, Bantayan Island (This is where the white sand beaches and resorts can be found). There's also a fast craft that would take only 30 minutes travel. Rates for both are between 75 - 130 pesos.

Around Sta. Fe: You can take a trisikad, tricycle or bicycle in roaming around Sta. Fe or better use your feet instead coz it's just a little town anyway. Rates for trisikad is P5 and P10 for tricycle. You can also rent a bicycle for P50/day.

Room Rates:

There are a variety of resorts in Sta. Fe which offer cheaper rates. Peak season is usually on holy week and they increase up to 20-30% of their usual rates. The following are the cheapest rates i know for offpeak season (May - October):

Budyong Beach Resort: 800 - 1400/per night
Kota Beach: 1000 - 1500/per night
St. Bernard Resort: 550 - 1200/per night
Sta. Fe Beach Clug: 1500 - 3000/per night
Marlins Beach Resort: 900 - 2000/per night
You can also put up a tent @ 300-400/per day

Whew, that was quite a task...hehehe(just kidding joe).

Hope you got everything you need to know about Bantayan. If you need some relaxation away from the city, Bantayan is the place...but i cannot assure you of some vitamins for the eyes (you know what i mean) coz cebuanos are kinda' conservative. You're lucky to spot some "white leg horns" in their skimpy bikini or going topless on your visit
to the place.

Ciao for now! And enjoy your Bantayan escapade...I just did!

Friday, April 01, 2005

My Little Princess

my little princess alessaundrei Posted by Hello

Hot Chicks!
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Let Me
By Michelle Mariotti

God, please do not let me miss those moments that I could have spent with my daughter. Let me carry her more often and feel her tiny body gently wrapped in my loving arms. For someday I will not have the strength to pick her up anymore.

Let me hold her close to smell her freshly washed hair and breathe in that wonderful baby scent that covers her delicate skin, for surely she will not smell this deliciously sweet for very long.

Let me enjoy changing her diapers for this gives me the chance to play with her miniature toes, tickle her tummy and make her feel comfortable. Someday she will ask me to leave and shut the door behind me claiming she can manage by herself.

Let me take more walks with her in her stroller while I can look down at her little face that is staring in wonder at this new world all around her. Let me do this often, for soon she will be able to walk on her own and leave the safety of her carriage.

Let me stand beside her crib at night for longer than a moment to watch her surrender to her peaceful slumber. These nights spent in a crib will be replaced soon enough by a much less cozy place for dreams.

Let me make her laugh every day. For I am sure the precious sounds of her first giggles are apt to change with time.

Let me delight in each and every milestone she reaches. Before I know it walking, drinking from a cup and other small miracles she has learned will seem ordinary.

Let me tell her how much I love her. Since there are bound to be times when she will not want to sit still to hear this.

Let me continue to listen attentively to her even after she has mastered the art of talking. Since people tend to listen less closely to a child once language becomes fluent.

Let me make time for peek-a-boo and pat-a-cake and other baby games. There will come a day when she will no longer want to participate in such childish antics.

Let me learn to enjoy the sound of her calling me "Mommy" even if it is yelled through the dripping of tears. For one day I will no longer be "Mommy" to her, but rather just "Mom."

Let me be the world to her right now because as every mother sadly comes to realize, their babies soon discover the world outside of their mother's arms.

Let me do these things and so much more, despite being busy, tired or overwhelmed because I would hate to look back and harbor regrets of times gone by that were lost to less important things than my daughter.

Yes, dear Lord, I want my daughter to grow up to be a strong, loving and intelligent woman, but please Lord do not let this happen overnight because someday memories will be all I have.